Plenty of times, students have been told to "stop bullying", as if it's just as simple as deciding not to be an aggressor or a victim.

The problem with bullying is there's no easy fix, just plenty of children who just want to live a normal life.

One of those is 12-year-old Dante DeSousa, who said he thinks it could be something as minor as the colour of his shirt that's made him a target.

"People have been calling me ‘gay' and ‘faggot' because of the shirts I wear . . . I like teal," he said. "I've been tackled to the ground like two times."

His mother said anywhere other than the schoolyard, what happens to her son would be considered sexual assault.

"He was tackled down to the ground and this other boy did a thrusting thing on him . . . Dante ran away," said Sheri DeSousa.

Dante said he's done what's recommended: talk to the teacher and the principal about what's happening.

"They talk to them and give them detention and the next time they do it, they suspend them . . . then they're back doing the same thing," he said.

"Everything I do, I make sure I do it carefully so I don't get bugged about it."

"I don't know what to do, I've done everything I can," Sheri said. "I've reached out to the school board, the trustee, superintendent and all they seem to do is sugar-coat it . . . but it's not their son or daughter that it's happening to."

Bullying a complicated issue to address

One report says one in five students are bullied, with another claiming one in three.

School boards are now required by law to tell parents and report any bullying incidents, but parents and experts say that's just window dressing.

"We first of all need to look at the culture of school, whether individuals are qualified and trained to deal with this complex issue," said David Millen, who has been working on anti-bullying initiatives for years.

"Whether kids are involved and whether there's a clear definition of bullying – if you don't have a clear definition, how on earth can you measure it?"

"You know the old saying it takes a village to raise a child?" said Angelle Bow. "People need to stand up and take notice of what's going on because it's not going to stop otherwise."

Bow's ten-year-old daughter Haylee said a nine-year-old girl threatened to suffocate and stab her at school - during anti-bullying week.

That girl was suspended, but Angelle said she still takes Haylee to and from school every day.

She's also enrolled her in a tae kwon do class.

"Since I started in tae kwon do, I feel more confidence in me," Haylee said.

While students can take steps like this to try and stand up for themselves, Sheri DeSousa said her son will always be affected by this bullying.

"He might look like he's OK and he might go to school with a smile on his face, but deep down inside he's scared and that's going to stay with him," she said. "That's going to stay with him forever."

With a report from CTV Ottawa's Joanne Schnurr

Tuesday – Part 2 of our special series looks at when bullying turns tragic.